12th june 2006

i din swim today.
i was lazy.
actually i wasnt in a really good mood.
it got spoilt.
but then again, thats wat life is about.
i've had enough of all its nonsense and stuff.
sometimes i wonder why i even bother to help others when i cant even help myself.
tell me why?
actually i dun wanna noe.
i try so hard to satisfy and i get nothing in return.
not that i want anything in return but i want to be noticed.
noticed by the people whom i try to help.
but... thats dumb.
i dunno.
it seems dumb to me now.
everything feels stupid.
and i feel useless.
i feel like *argh*
i cried today.
becos i was angry.
i was angry at myself for getting angry.
for no particular reason.
actually i got irritated by my mum.
and i got angry.
cos i was trying my best to study.
ok.
i'm not me today.
maybe i should go back to my old self.
staying in the corner and keeping quiet.
not telling anyone anything.
maybe things will get better.
i shouldnt talk alot cos apparently i'm being rude to my sisters.
according to my mum.
its so unfair.
clare can do it.
but i cant.
she can get away with anything.
but i cant.
she gets wat she wants.
but i dun.
but she's the youngest of all 3.
so i have nth to say bout that.
and as for the other sis, i cant say anything.
another long story
well i've had enough of everything!