14th July 2006

this week has been an eventful one i guess. it's a really bad week for me. results came back and i actually predicted correctly what i would get. F for everything. geography, maths and econs. i really dun understand why i got those grades given the fact that i studied really really hard for it. its the worst results ever. but i have to forget this and move on. somehow its hard but i'll have to try. i guess.

do u ever get the feeling that sometimes its really wrong to express your own feelings? i feel that way. somehow it just makes me feel that its wrong to show that u are really really sad inside cos it will just affect the people around u. i really dunno how to say it but i hope it sounds the way that i wanted it to sound like.

my body has been aching like mad since tuesday. after monday's PE. monday i played badminton with lappie and tuesday i woke up to realise that my right arm muscle hurt. and to make matters worse, my ankle started giving me problems too. maybe i'm too heavy or something but i hope it isnt so. maybe its just the stupid ankle that is wrong somewhere. then there was this occassional cough and the sudden loss of taste. i couldnt taste the taste of the soup my mummy made. and she says there's something wrong with me. but i dun agree with her. ok then there was thursday's PE. apparently we were late for lesson and we had to do so many push ups. and my arms now feel like they are not attached to my shoulders. and today i dragged myself around school, walking at a really slow pace. then there was the TB skin test thing. i really dun understand why some said that it isnt painful cos it was painful. it reminded me why i was afraid of injections. after that went home and just fell asleep on my comfy bed. until qing woke me up to go for a swim. it was awfully cold and i couldnt really swim properly becos of my aching arms. so i just soaked up the coldness of the water for like that one hour or so.

i went to whitesands to meet val, QX, yongkit and ah meng( i really dunno his real name and i have been calling him that ever since he entered coral). anyway ah meng decided to do something really racist and he got confronted by one particular indian guy who seemed to have had a really bad day cos he was really fierce. i shall not blog much about it. apparently val and QX have had a bad week too and they were constantly talking bout the bad times and i was constantly trying to understand what they were trying to say and which situation they were talking about. it was fun though. took a bus home with QX and she talked alot as of always and she has really matured in her thinking! the situations in which she has got herself into has really made her change for the better i assume. but she's different. really different. as for val, besides her haircut, nth mauch ahs changed rite =p haha thats the way i will always remember her as, the one who always talks openly about how she feels. haha.

next week is gonna be as eventful as this week i guess. 20th july would be my class time with miss lai and i assume that on the 22nd there will be the meet the parents thing. it'll be interesting i guess. given the fact that about 9 ppl have the same results as me.

i have been studying in school for mos tof the days this week and its really tiring though i cant really say that i've studied alot during that time. i feel super duper tired whenever i go home and things that happen at home can really agitate me so i try my very best to control my temper and stuff but sometimes it seems totally impossible. and i also try to get as much sleep as i can get cos my eyebags i feel are getting worse. but it doesnt really matter to me now.




the things that lie beyond that smile.